Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Power Up The B.S. Meters

Our dear President will be giving his State of the Union address tonight. He probably won't say anything important, but he'll try to put a happy face on his miserable approval ratings (the worst for a second-term president since Nixon during Watergate!). It's appropriate that today is Groundhog Day, because we're going to hear the same old things all over again.

Expect him to carry on and on about the election in Iraq. He'll probably reiterate the freedom theme of his inauguration speech. Don't expect a timetable for when we're going to get out of there so our soldiers stop getting killed. He may talk about the economy, but his words probably won't match your wallet. He'll say it's getting better. He won't talk about offshoring of jobs or the growing trade deficit. He certainly won't declare war on the corporatocracy that is holding down wages and benefits, ravaging the environment, reaping the benefits of deregulation and capitalist cronyism, and paying minimal taxes for the privilege of doing so. He won't brag about how this is the best time for big business since the 1920s. If he talks about health care, he'll probably blame it all on the trial lawyers and malpractice lawsuits. He won't mention how his tort reform plan will rob us of our only recourse against incompetent doctors and unregulated corporations. Hee won't mention that abortions are up or that his "abstinence-only" approach is not effective. Expect him to tell us how Social Security is in big trouble, and expect him to use the same bogus figures and logic that he has been using for the past month. Don't expect any concrete details about how he intends to implement privatization (which he now spins as "personal accounts"), and surely nothing about where those trillions of dollars will come from to fund it (hint: when you go the bathroom after the speech, look in the mirror, or better yet, look at your kids). Oh, and he'll probably mention God/Jesus a few times.

This begs the question, why bother having a State of the Union address? The informational purpose it once served has long been outdated, or "rendered quaint" as Alberto Gonzales might say. Nowadays it is more like the "Spin on my Policies" address.

I'd love to join you all to watch the show, but, uh, I have to wash my hair.

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